My notebooks are empty. I was thinking yesterday afternoon that I might not have a story to share today without digging into the archives (I am saving those for next week. Stay tuned). Early evening we were headed home after some post-nap errands. We were tired and hungry. The car was relatively quiet. Until…
Alice: (to The Mama) I’m glad you got married together because I’m starting to like the shirts and the hats that you have. You have your own stuff, don’t you?
The Mama: Of course.
Alice: I like Sponge Bob Squirt Pants. I like to say it. Squirt Squirt Squirt.
The Mama: His name is Sponge Bob Square Pants.
Alice: No it’s not. It’s Squirt. Sponge Bob Squirt Pants. I don’t even hear the “SQ” sound. Squirt Squirt Squirt.
The Mama: Square Square Square.
Alice: Squirt-
The Mama: Square-
Alice: Squirt-
The Mama: Square-
Alice: Squirt Squirt-
The Mama: Square Square-
(giggles. then silence. for a moment)
Alice: Hello Titty. Ha ha! I said Hello Titty. Knock knock!
The Mama: Who’s there?
Alice: Worm heart.
The Mama: Worm heart who?
Alice: Worm heart I really love you so please go away. I’m not going to get up today.
Seriously. This all happened. In this order. Though I did omit a highly detailed discussion of how flea and heartworm medicines work on our dog. Because I was probably wrong.
The Mama,
I was going to write: You invented Alice, right, cause she’s too awesome to be true. Then I thought… Well, she did invent Alice… With The Papa. What will The Alice be in 5 years from now?
Le Clown
Ha! She really is too awesome to be true, isn’t she?! Sometimes, though, she is really to rotten to be true. So it all balances out, no?
The Mama,
In my experience, being spoiled is just a term of endearment for “genius”.
Le Clown
Perhaps…
She gets more hilarious every day. Seriously, by the time this kid is twelve she’s going to rule the world through sheer awesomeness.
I sure hope so. And with that power, I hope she figures out a way to erase my student loan debt…
I will now refer to our friend Bob as Sponge Bob Squirt Pants.
Isn’t it just the worst name? Still, she vehemently disagrees with me every time I try to tell her otherwise. Even when I explained that his pants were square, she didn’t buy it.
It’s absolutely disgusting. I think that’s why I like it so much.
Eli has decided there are no birds. There are only chickens and ducks….I know. I tried to explain his multiple errors. He just sighs and says, “No mama.”
It is amazing how exasperating we mama-types can be when we insist on something that is so clearly false.
I just love the way the Kidling’s mind works…..
Me too. Can you imagine how boring my life would be if she didn’t say these things out loud? If she just kept them in her tiny little brain? It would be tragic.
For all of us Christine, for all of us…
That makes me very happy. Thanks, Lori.
Her comments make me laugh every day…and this is the first time I have heard a kidling be happy about their parents’ union for fashion’s sake…:-)
I know. It certainly wasn’t what I expected to hear her finish that sentence with!
Even if you’re too tired to be on your toes, she ensures that your stature is always balletic!
Well, aren’t you the optimist! I look a bit more haggard than your visual image might suggest. Regardless, I am going with yours.
Definitely do – I have no doubt you feel haggard at times, but a ballerina always looks d-i-v-i-n-e..A new adjective for Alice’s expanding vocabulary. It makes me laugh to think what she would consider divine (poop? ice cream? her mom, without question)
Ice cream, definitely. And a good fart, yes, but probably not poop. And muffins. The Kidling loves muffins.
My mom has a great story like that about me. She never misses an opportunity to tell it. Of course, young children always know the correct words. It’s the parents that are wrong.
Yep. Every single time. We are just too dumb to realize it.
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